this one time in art class we were painting and my teacher was like
"hannah take off your jacket id hate for you to get paint on your led zeppelin sweater"
and i was just like
Hannah take off your shirt. I’d hate for you to get paint on you Led Zepplin shirt.
huh, that makes sense
let me just-
wait a second
maKE IT STOP
hello darkness my old friend
sWEE T MERCIFUL HEAVENS MAK E IT STO P
MY BROTHER TEXTED A RADIO STATION TO GIVE A SHOUTOUT AND THE RADIO STATION ACTUALLY READ IT OUT AND IT WAS “GREAT DAY AT THE BEACH WITH MY GIRL FROM HEYWOOD JABLOMI” AND THEY READ IT ALOUD AND THE ENTIRE RADIO WENT DEAD FOR A FEW SECONDS BECAUSE THEY REALIZED WHAT THEY SAID I’M LAUGHING SO FUCKING HARD
whenever i’m sad i just remember that my name rhymes with wanker and then i laugh
my name autocorrects to asshole i think we should be frens
The Accidentally and Unfortunately Somehow Butt and Masturbation-Related Name Club
we are the co-founders and there are no members but that is okay
My name rhymes with dick-hole can I join
God: Gabe, stop, I’m working.
Gabriel: I WANT TO MAKE SOMETHING TOOOOOOO!
God: Here’s a box of parts, go nuts.
God: -several hours later- Gabe? Where are you, my son?
Gabriel: DAD, LOOKIT!
God: Dafuq is that?
Gabriel: A PLATYPUS!
OHMYGODS, THANK YOU FOR DRAWING THAT!
They don’t do much
this is the funniest thing ever
LOOK at it though
"just put it in australia"